Sunday Mind Dump

Just finished up a teaching series called "Be The Church." It was something we just plain needed to do. As we are in the infancy of 242 church we have to remind ourselves that we are to be about our Fathers business and he is in the business of people. That means if we want to be the church and not just do church we should be:

• Loving the unlovely.
• Spending time with those far from God.
• Fishing for men (and women.)
• And spending our lives connected to each other.
  

Those are tall tasks I know but Acts 2:42-47 is the handbook for how to grow a church. The question remains....will we become an Acts 242 church?


So let's dump:

• Loved, loved, loved doing the brunch potluck last week and not "doing church." In many ways, we had more church that day than we do every other Sunday with a message and music!
• Only a month until Pastor Craig comes on full-time. I've been talking to him on a regular basis and he is happy as a clam about it. God is going to do some good things though him.
• Next week April and I will be away. Enjoy the Christmas music and Jenn. I am sure she is going to do a great job telling the Christmas story. Truth be told, I am terrible with anything remotely traditional!! People will probably be much happier with her telling the story :)
• After Christmas we are going to start a one month series I am calling "Lost Luggage." It's the final series I am teaching before Craig comes on and takes over as the primary teacher.
  
• We just announced our Chili Cook Off/Soup Cook off this morning. It's set up for Jan 29th and should be a hoot. Details will follow.
• Looking forward to unplugging for a few days over the holidays. April and I have had a rough month and getting away will do us some good!
• All my NFL teams won today. That doesn't happen often. Now if my fantasy teams would start playing to their potential!
• One more week of school. Enough said.
• I am out!
  

The Power of a Connection

Just read some statistics that blow me away. If a first time visitor get's connected (makes some friends and is offered a meaningful place to serve) said visitor is 5 times more likely to stay at your church. I guess this fly's in the face of allowing first time visitors anonymity.

So, somehow churches need to find a balance and a way to allow people freedom to explore the church while at some point in the exploration meeting up with people that can befriend them.

Guilty As Charged

Doing some reading this morning and as God so often does he showed me how wrong I and perhaps to a larger extent the church as a whole has been. I have made plans, hosted events, and tried to grow a few churches by focusing on young families. In fact, if we are being honest that's what most churches focus on when they are trying to grow. Young families seem to be like the trophy of all (ok, at least most) churches these days. Yet as I read James 2 this morning, I had an overwhelming sense of conviction that I have been guilty of playing favorites with God's people.

Check this out:

James (NLT)2: 1 My dear brothers and sisters, how can you claim to have faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ if you favor some people over others? 2 For example, suppose someone comes into your meeting dressed in fancy clothes and expensive jewelry, and another comes in who is poor and dressed in dirty clothes. 3 If you give special attention and a good seat to the rich person, but you say to the poor one, “You can stand over there, or else sit on the floor”—well, 4 doesn’t this discrimination show that your judgments are guided by evil motives? 5 Listen to me, dear brothers and sisters. Hasn’t God chosen the poor in this world to be rich in faith? Aren’t they the ones who will inherit the Kingdom he promised to those who love him? 6 But you dishonor the poor! Isn’t it the rich who oppress you and drag you into court? 7 Aren’t they the ones who slander Jesus Christ, whose noble namet you bear?

Dang that hits me hard.

I have often said as a prayer to God "Lord, give us the people no one else want's." Yet, my and our actions corporately as a church have been geared around reaching the group that every church wants, young families. I am not sure where I go with this, but it is giving me plenty of uneasiness as a pastor and church leader. How can I manage to have my actions, and our churches actions live up to the words of James? Right now, I just don't know. But I can tell you this stings a little.

Thanksgiving Mind Dump

I have never been one to follow tradition. I am not sure why but I am just not sentimental like that. I do however find myself this Thanksgiving reflecting on how much I have grown over this last year and how for the first time in the last few years I feel like God is stirring something up in me. I am not sure what it is yet, I just feel like something big is about to happen and that is an awesome feeling.

So in light of that lets dump:

• So thankful for God and all he's done for me.
• Thankful for my family. They've seen the good and the bad and they still act like they know me and that's awful nice of them!
• Thankful for God's second chances. In life, in ministry, and in love.
  
• Thankful God doesn't treat us like we treat his children.
• Thankful I am going to get away with my bride for a week in a few weeks. Sun, good food, and relaxation is much needed right about now.
• Thankful that God has provided for us. Times are tough for many and we've been blessed far beyond what we deserve.
• Thankful for life and health. So many I know have lost theirs too soon.
• Thankful God allows me to work in ministry. It's truly an honor. I don't ever want to take it for granted or think that somehow I am good enough. It's only by his power and hand I can do what I am called to do.
• Thankful for good friends who pray for me way more than I seem to pray for them.
• Thankful God has allowed my Grandfather a little more time.
  

I could go on all night....

My Facebook Fast

Thinking I might be taking a month long fast from Facebook in December. I need to spend some extra time thinking and praying about some ministry related things and playing on Facebook just seems to take up so much idle time...I do enjoy having a place to goof around and stay in touch with all my friends from this stage of my life and other stages of my life but I need a break from it all for a while.

Dec 1st-Dec 31st...

Sowing Seeds....Good Post by Rick Warren

I get a great devotional delivered to my email daily from Rick Warren. This was today's....loved the post so I thought I'd share it with everyone who stumbles upon my blog.....enjoy :)

Giving is Spiritual Investment, not Expense by Rick Warren

Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. 2 Corinthians 9:6 (NIV) "No farmer considers sowing seeds an expense. He sees it as an investment." God often compares giving to sowing seeds. Like a farmer, if you go out and sow a bunch of seeds, you'll get a bunch of plants. If you only sow a few seeds, you'll only get a few plants. And if you sow no seeds, you'll get no plants. No farmer considers sowing seeds an expense. He sees it as an investment. He knows that if you don't buy seed, you won't have a farm. When a farmer plants seeds, he's excited about it; he's hopeful about it. He has faith because he puts one corn seed in the ground and expects to get a whole corn stalk full of more seed than he put in. He looks forward to the harvest because he knows he's going to be blessed. Here are three things the Bible says about sowing and reaping: Whatever you sow, you are going to reap. If you sow criticism, people are going to criticize you. If you sow gossip, people are going to gossip about you. Whatever you sow in life, you are going to reap it back. Count on it. The good news is, this works in positive terms too. Give it to God and watch his blessings flow onto others and back to you. You will reap more than you sow every time. A farmer who plants one kernel in the ground will get a stalk with eight or nine ears that have 100 to 200 corn kernels each. You always reap in a different season than you sowed. You sow in one season and then you reap the benefit in another season. You can go plant a seed today, dig it up tomorrow, and there will be no difference. But if you let it settle, slowly it will grow and produce. That's the faith portion of the waiting period in God's economy. How big a harvest do you want to see in your life? It's up to you. God says, "According to your faith will it be done to you" (Matthew 9:29 NIV).

Sunday Mind Dump

I haven't written much in my blog over the last month or so for several reasons. We've just been busy and something has to give. I haven't had as much to say as in the past because I am trying to step back and just let God do his thing and talk about that rather than me trying to make things happen. Lastly, because I am trying to allow others to build the church and not so much me. I am a short timer at 242 and while I want to give it my all during my tenure, I am stepping back come January and April and I will be stepping away from all ministry at some point this spring or summer. So let's dump:

• Since Closing Real Life I have had 5-6 offers to pastor churches...one more over the last few weeks. I don't know what God has in store for me, but I do know if I have a say in the matter We'll be taking more time off from ministry after we finish our tenure at 242. If God has other plan's so be it, we'll obey, but if you ask me :)
• So much fun today watching the kids sing and tell stories. I love family worship experience days!
• It was even more fun having the kids play instruments this time! Great job Bree, Tyler, and Tyler!!
• Looking forward to the Christmas season. April and I have a get away scheduled. It might be our last one for a few years if some things happen we've been talking about. (stay tuned) and no, it's not a baby.
• Helped Jake fill out his first college application today. We'll see....We'll see.
• I am pumped about next weekends kick off of out new teaching series I am calling "Be The Church!)

Better get back to football!

Tuesday Mind Dump

• Really digging a couple of new CD's Third Day's new CD "Move" and Lincoln Brewster's new CD "Real Life." Awesome music
• Looking forward to Friday night. We're having friends over for dinner and conversation. We don't do that often enough...this should be fun.
• Good music set list for this weekend. Should be a great time.
  
• Looking forward to the next steps God has for me. Been really moving me in certain directions. Looking forward to acting on it when the time is right.
• Hoping April's car is out of the body shop this week. I cannot stand driving that little rental car....
• Been in a zone preaching the last few weeks. Hope that continues after my week off. Got some good stuff coming up too.

Reflection(s)

What a difference a year makes. It just hit me that it was a year ago that we were entering our last week at Real Life. I was spent spiritually, emotionally, and physically spent. As sad as it was to close RL, I don't know how much longer I could have gone on even if we had been more solvent. We took six months and didn't do much of anything church related. We visited around and got to worship with friends that we'd been meaning to catch up with but nothing in terms of playing, teaching, leading, serving. It was a really much needed respite.

Last spring we offered to help a friend that was planting a church in the Findlay area. Originally, we were going to come and help out for the summer. The summer gradually turned into we'll stay till launch next Easter. God has a purpose and a plan in everything. Last month our friend passed away. He was only 54 and had a massive heart attack. While it's been tough for everyone, it's pretty obvious that God called us to 242 Church to help. God knew what was going to happen and he knew he needed us there. We are not called to be at 242 long term. God also had a plan and a man that he wanted to lead that church. Next week we'll get to hear from him (Craig.) We'll pray that his calling to 242 is confirmed by everyone at church.

It's been a weird year. When we closed RL I said that I was done in ministry. I meant it, I really wanted nothing to do with it anymore. I was tired of friends who loved me to my face, but spoke ill of my behind my back. I was tired of the attacks on my family. I was just plain tired. I've often said that I love God but struggled to love his people. If you've ever been in ministry, perhaps you can relate. I told God that if ever wanted me back in ministry that he'd have to come get me because I would not be looking for ministry work.

I believe God has a funny streak about him. We went to 242 just to help out with worship and I was going to coach Scott a little behind the scenes and then we'd walk away. Here I am leading a church again (although just short term.) Over the last 6 months, I have had 6 people call, email, and take me out for coffee asking if I'd be interested in helping out or taking a ministry position with their church. Small group pastor, teaching pastor, lead pastor, worship....all kinds of ministry opportunities. One very large church, and some mid to smaller sized churches...Till now, I have turned them all down and really without much thought or even prayer.....Finally, last week. I said OK God I GET IT.....You want me in ministry.

I know what my calling is. I have for a long time. When the right offer comes along. I will do it....until then I'll follow where he leads. Sometimes, I forget that my life isn't my own. In order to have a life I have to be willing to give it away. If it means taking the kind of crap (yes I just said crap) that comes with ministry I will learn to endure. I am learning that the Apostle Paul said when he said "For me to live is Christ."

You Might Be A Pharisee If....

I stumbled upon this post here. Very good post...I could add a whole bunch more to it....but still really good!

Get your best Jeff Foxworthy voice on as you read....

You might be a Pharisee if:

• You see church as all about ministering to you and your personal needs.
• You don’t really think you need grace – after all, you’re doing pretty good at this Christian thing.
• You judge others by their actions, but are offended when people fail to judge you by your intentions.
• You don’t really feel called to minister to “those” people.You sure wish ole Jimbo or Earnestine had been here to hear this today – because God knows she sure does need to hear it.
• You rush to judgment and meting out punishment first without ever considering the possibility of mercy when you hear of someone else’s failure.
• You’re consumed with splinters and haven’t dealt with personal logs.
• You actually acknowledge that you have sin, but know it’s nowhere near what other people are doing.
• God will take care of “those people.” You just worry about ministering to me and my family and keeping us happy pastor.
• Phariseeism is a virus – contagious – the only way to treat it, to wash regularly with the water of the Word and apply grace generously.

Sunday Mind Dump

Had a great time teaching today. Last summer I was working around the house and God gave me a message about healing our hurts. I thought "Ok, but when in the world am I supposed to teach that message God?" God knew. I am so honored that God allows me to do what I do. When we came to 242 it was supposed to be short term, just long enough to help Scott get the ministry off the ground and stable. I am glad we followed the leading of the Holy Spirit in bringing us there. It won't be forever. But, still glad to have been a part. So let's dump:

• Some highlights from the message. You don't have enough emotional energy to worry about getting even with people. Let God balance the books.
  
• Forgiving others isn't about them deserving it. It's about you being able to move on with your life....and because God forgives you and I.
• Fill your mind up with Jesus and you won't have time to worry about getting even with people.
• You'll know you're healed when your ready to start helping others overcome. That's how God makes good use for our pain....when you use it to serve.
• Sunday's are long days for us....we leave the house at 7am and don't usually get home until after 1. When our time is up at 242 we are going to take another ministry sabbatical for a few months and recharge our batteries.
• Really looking forward to our cruise this December. Getting away for a week is going to be so sweet!
• So many people hurting. So few willing to do what it takes to get well. It's not easy....but there is great freedom in it.
• My past is not my future. God is going to do a new thing in my life....
• I am out....peace everyone.....time to veg out and watch some foosball!
  

What am I Praying For?

I often wonder how many Christians go through life not really knowing what they should be praying for. Do we pray for ourselves is that too selfish? Do we only pray for those we love, but not us? Or do we pray for everything and everyone? Well...I am by no means an expert on prayer so I will just tell you what I pray for nightly.

• I pray that God would bless and protect my family.
• I pray that God would bless and protect my friends.
• I pray for my church and my pastor (although that's me right now...so feel free to pray for me!)
• I pray for those I know who are enduring trials and suffering.
• I pray for anything else that God lays on my heart.

I think for most of us, if we could just start with those things....we'd be getting somewhere...I know you'd think people in ministry would be much deeper than that....but I have to confess...I have never been much of a prayer warrior....For years I felt bad about that....but a few years ago, I just felt God release me from feeling bad about something that wasn't my spiritual gift. All of us can and should pray regularly....but not all of us are going to be the kind of prayer warriors that can spend hours and hours praying down heaven and earth.....just pray and listen....be obedient to what God is leading you to become as a pray-er!

Sunday Mind Dump

Seeming like these mind dumps are morphing into Monday morning mind dumps more and more. Course it is football season.....So let's dump:

• Great day at 242 yesterday. Loved the talk by Jenn Ditmeyer.
  
• Jenn brought up some great points and ideas for the church. She did a fabulous job talking about needing to raise the funds to pay for a full time pastor. We have a tremendous opportunity with some matching funds. We've got the guy picked out we think is the next person to lead the church....the next step is God providing the resources through his people.
• Loved hearing Jake play the cajon yesterday. Sounded so cool.
• Speaking of music, it seems like over the last month or so we've hit our stride in terms of song selection and style and we are starting to see much more responsiveness with the congregation.
• Looking forward to the next few months. I love putting things together and that's what we are going to be working on. The kids ministry is coming along nicely, worship is moving forward, we are going to be moving some other area's forward as well. We'll talk about those in the coming weeks.
  
• It's been nice to be back teaching again. I hadn't done it (teaching of Sunday's) for a year and after this run is over April and I are going to take another small ministry sabbatical and figure out what our next steps are going to be. Right now we are not sure when that's going be...It could be as soon as January or as late as next summer. It all depends on the leader we are bringing in and what his needs and desires are.
• I've had 4-5 offers for ministry related work since coming along side 242 last spring. We've turned them all down knowing that God had called us to use what we'd learned about church planting to help get 242 off the ground. We'll see how God leads over the next year or so in that respect. One thing is clearer than ever, April and I have a much better perspective on what God is calling us to do with our lives.
  

God Doesn't Want to See Your But...

Once and a while Perry Noble writes something in his blog that just needs to be share word for word......the following is one of those posts....love it!!

Taken from www.perrynoble.com

God doesn’t want to see your “but!”

Your “but” is nasty…it is gross…it should be covered up and never shown…

Yet so often times we want to “moon God” and show Him our “but” when God’s Word is declared…

• “I know I need to plant a church…”BUT” I don’t have enough money.”
• “I know I need to take that step of faith…”BUT” I don’t know how things will turn out.”
• “I know I need to admit that I am struggling with sin…”BUT” I am afraid of what people will think of me.”
• “I know I need to share Christ with my friend…”BUT” they may label me and I may lose a friend.”
• “I know I need to put Jesus first in my finances…”BUT” I don’t think I can afford to.”
• “I know I need to end this dating relationship…”BUT” if I do then I may be single for the rest of my life.”
• “I know that God wants me to fight FOR my marriage…”BUT” the easiest thing to do is walk away and start over.”
• “I know the decision I need to make…”BUT” if I do what I know I need to do it is going to cause me to have to embrace the unknown.”

See what I mean…we always want God to see our “BUT!”…and yet He isn’t interested…because…

He sent Jesus to the earth for your “BUT!”

Jesus died on the cross for your “BUT!”

Jesus rose from the grave for your “BUT!”

And Jesus reigns OVER YOUR “BUT!”

So stop telling Him about your “BUT” – get off of your “BUT” and get on with what He has said to get on with!!!

No one ever accomplished anything great for God by showing Him their “BUT!”

He is able to handle your “BUT!”

So do whatever He’s telling you to do…and stop worrying about your “BUT!”

Sunday Mind Dump

Just a great day at 242. I just know that people needed the message today.

So, let's dump:

• Spoke about loss and grieving loss today. We never loose the scars but God does heal us. Time doesn't heal anything...The holy spirit does.
  
• It was and is an honor to step in for my friend Scott. We'll miss him dearly.
  
• Would encourage everyone to pray for the leadership at 242 as they are trying to hear from God about the long term direction of the church. I love being there but April and I don't feel like God is calling us to be at 242 permanently. We believe God sent us there to help build up the ministry and we'll be there as long as that takes.
  
• In the mean time, I'll be filling in as the pastor and making sure the church and kingdom is moving forward.
  
• Good things are in the works.
  

Legalism Raises it's Ugly Head Again

It's pretty regular that I hear about people struggling with Christianity and I completely get it. Today was no exception. The problem most people have isn't with Jesus....People like Jesus. He loved people, spent his time with the sick and outcasts, challenged the hypocrisy in the church. The problem most people have is with those in the church.

If you could take the majority of the complaints and put them into a single one it's this. Many churches have a legalistic air about them. Sometimes that comes off as hypocrisy....but at it's heart it's legalism. Here is my definition of legalism...When we believe there is something we can DO to please God....You have to understand for many people there is a goodness that seems right to men....and then there is a goodness that seems right to God....and they are usually very different things....Believing in the goodness that seems right to men is what leads to legalism and the very thing that moves people farther from God and his church.

Here's how legalism in churches works. People in their attempt to please God will adopt standards that God never intended for us to have. For example: They wrongly believe bringing your best to God means getting up extra early on Sunday and putting on your best suit. Or, they might believe that when God says not to defile your body he's talking about not getting piercings or a tattoo. Or, maybe they believe that not drinking alcohol is they way they are going to get closer to God.....all of these things are man's way of trying to please God and to be honest they are a waist of time and energy.

God looks at the inside of us...he looks at our hearts. Jesus gave us two commands that we were and are to follow...These measure the heart of a person and that is what God looks at. Jesus said in Luke 10:27 that we should "love God with all our heart, soul, and mind and then we should love our neighbors as ourselves." (Renner Paraphrase) Seems pretty simple and straightforward.

I am not sure why anyone or church would want to put any more standards on us than those....I am not sure in a lifetime we'd ever be able to truly measure up to that standard....which is why God loved us enough to accept us through his son anyway.

Understand this: There is nothing you can do to please God by looking a certain way, dressing a certain way, or acting a certain way....That stuff is shallow and temporary. God cares about what's on the inside of us.....he cares about the condition of our hearts....are we serving and loving him or ourselves....our we serving those in our lives or are we concerned with how many toys we can acquire? Don't allow legalism to raise it's ugly head in your life or in your church....it doesn't help anyone....

Sunday Mind Dump

So many things going on in my mind and life it's hard to put them all into a single mind dump. I'll throw a few things out here and some I'll save for just me :)

So let's dump:

• Seems like every Sunday there is something wrong. Some type of problem that wants to get itself in the way of what we are doing. For better or worse, it is probably just an attack that we need to fight back against.
  
• Working on a few new musicians for church. Hopefully we can get them on stage next week. That would be cool!
• God is putting a passion back in me for some things that hasn't been there in a long time. I am honestly afraid of what that means. Leading worship is easy. The other stuff is very difficult.
  
• Took a 2 hour nap today. That has only happened a few times over the last few years. WOW!
• Football season starts next weekend. Excited about that!

Better get off this computer.

Modern Worship

Recently, we've endured some conflict over the notion of modern worship being performance based and more traditional worship being congregation centered. I certainly understand the discussion and the reasons behind it. Most traditional church music was written out of revelation with the church in mind. It was written for congregational singing. Modern worship shares some of those traits but it also ads the added element of commercial appeal. Many modern worship artists are very talented and have a commercial sound that is radio friendly.

The argument I think can best be understood and appreciated within the context of what God is doing in the midst of a generation of worshipers. In today's society, its acceptable for worship leaders to journal their personal experiences and quite often those experiences end up as songs that we sing today. Sometimes they are personal prayers that just can't be shaken. Sometimes the song stems from a message that stirs the heart of the worship leader. Sometimes the songs come from life in general and reflecting on God's goodness.

Is there a performance aspect of modern worship ABSOLUTELY. We cannot allow ourselves to be fooled into thinking there isn't. Totally removing the performance aspect of music would place us in the position of being ineffective because the music would be so bad it would actually become a turn off. We can move past the performance aspect of worship by having our hearts right during the week. Spending time in prayer, seeking God in humility, and listening to his voice. We can also eliminate some of the performance aspect of modern worship if we are well prepared. When you are so prepared you don't have to think about singing or playing your instrument you are free do what comes naturally and just worship God.

We wouldn't allow a pastor to come on stage and be a complete dud, have zero personality, and not be able to teach. Likewise, we shouldn't allow people to come on stage that God hasn't blessed to do music. With that comes a certain element of performance no doubt. But preparation and having a right heart can outweigh most of that. God has raised up some great worship leaders over the last 10 years that are not only incredible musicians but sold out to worshiping Him. Don't write that off because you see it as a performance. Think about the time and commitment to Christ these people make. Many of of the people volunteering their time to sing and play an instrument for God in our churches today could easily be making money playing and singing in clubs and bars on the weekends. Instead, they are using their talents for God. That's a great thing!

All music that is written with a humble heart and lifts up God honors him. I love having the freedom to express it. Makes me feel like writing some more songs!

Sunday Mind Dump

It's been a personally and spiritually trying week to say the least. I am glad it's over and we can move on and start a new one. So let's dump:

• Starting the process of building a band for 242 church. Getting some decent response and that is encouraging!
• Going to be leading a small group this fall. It'll be nice to get back to teaching.
• April has stepped her worship leading up big time. She's putting more time, energy, and prayer into it than ever before and you can see the results.
• Looking forward to getting JT on the stage with us. Hopefully, that happens next week.
• Slept like a baby last night. First night in a week that's happened. Sad I had to get up for work or I'd still be in there!
• In fact, I better get moving and get dressed for work. It's coming whether I am ready or not!
  

Missing You Guys

The last year has without a doubt been a year of ups and downs. There have been good times and rough ones as with any year. One of the many things I am personally grateful to God for is that sometimes he brings clarity in the midst of confusion. Last fall, we were put in the position of having to close Real Life. Some agreed it was time, others wanted to find a path to stay open. I understand that. The decision I made brought with it many things, the loss of friends that I once considered close, the continued and growing friendship of others. If I had to make the same choices today, I believe I would make the exact same decision.

The last year has been good for my soul. I've had a lot of time to reflect, and quite honestly, shed many tears. I've had sleepless nights, and nights that I've slept like a baby over things. One thing that keeps coming back to me from God and some other people that I know and trust has been them asking me if I felt regret over it and the answer is still no. I just had nothing left to give. Real Life had drained me. Most of that is MY OWN FAULT. I wanted to do more than we really needed to do. I thought doing it would help create an atmosphere where people would be more inclined to invite their friends. And perhaps to some extent that was and is true. But, at the end of the day, I only had so much emotional and spiritual energy, and quite frankly April and I about went broke financing the church and paying it's debts off.

Over the last year, here is what I have come to miss and wish I could have back. Real Life was the closest thing to true Biblical fellowship I have ever been a part of. We shared meals, we laughed and cried together. When one of us hurt, we all hurt. When someone needed help, there were more people than you'd ever need showing up to help, and without resorting to shaming people into helping. People came because they wanted to, they came because they loved each other, and more than that, they genuinely cared for one another.....I haven't seen that anywhere else yet, and if there is one thing I could put in a bottle and take with me everywhere and teach other churches how to do it I would in a second.

In that way, Real Life was and is the closest thing to authentic New Testament Christianity I have ever been a part of. So when I am asked if I have any regrets, honestly, the answer is no. Could we have made a few different decisions sure, who can't say that. I am proud to have been able to be used by God to put something like that together....I miss you guys.

We're All Overdressed

I've been doing quite a bit of playing around on the internet lately before school starts again and came across a mainstream Christian band that has a new album coming out called "Over Dressed." The basic premise of the album "stems from “the idea that we’re overdressed as believers and in the church—it’s talking about sin, depravity, shame—that we’re not who we were intended to be” but tend to try to disguise it." Wow, what a beautiful word picture!

We put on fancy clothes, we speak so eloquently, we do so many things to provide the appearance that we have it all together, yet we are a sinful lot of people. We turn from God virtually every chance we get. It's almost as if we daily cheat on a very jealous mate. We act is if our unfaithfulness is going unnoticed. It's not.

God in his mercy, allows us to stumble, fall, and get back up again. My encouragement for today is in knowing I don't have to be overdressed to come to God's table. He takes me just as I am, with all my faults, all my problems, all my hang ups, and my infidelity to him. He doesn't say clean up first he simply says come.

I love that about God. He just says come. Don't worry about the way you're dressed just come. Try that at many churches in America today....We have a long way to go....Thankfully, we have a God who is long on mercy and short on judgment. I wish more of us could find our way to where God is....

Gate Keepers

Every church has gate keepers. Gate keepers are those people that are hesitant to accept new people. Gate keepers are concerned with keeping the history and traditions of the church intact over reaching out to people and bringing them into genuine community. Gate keepers are more concerned with the things they value in a church than catching on to what the Holy Spirit is doing and following His lead. Gate keepers refer to classes of people in the church. Those people who have put their time in and those who haven't. Gate keepers are good people who can be harmful to a churches growth.

I was talking with a friend last night who has been going to this church for a year. She has offered to get involved and help out with things a few times and is feeling frustrated because she wants to be a part of the community but there are a few people that are keeping her at a distance. In this case the pastors have appointed a gate keeper as the leader of a ministry further illuminating the problem. The gate keeper will say things like: you've only been here for X amount of time right? Or, we at X church prefer things this way, or any other thing that shows you are an outsider.

Gate keepers can really hamper a churches and a persons growth. Churches grow by more and more people feeling welcome enough to invite their friends and families to church. People grow through their service to God. If you can identify gate keepers and get them out of the way you can expect their to be more growth. If people feel like their friends and family are going to be genuinely welcomed into a warm and loving community of faith they'll invite. If people feel that they aren't being welcomed with open arms into the community of faith not only will they not invite their friends and family, they won't be staying long.

Sound like anyone you know?

Back To School

So, this is back to school week for me. While I love my work it always feels like I need another couple of weeks off work. I am not sure why that is but it just never feels like it's time to go back. It kinda makes me think that if the summer was extended and I had two more weeks off I'd still feel like I needed two more weeks at the end of the two more weeks.

Since I have to go back to school one thing is on the agenda today. Clothes shopping. I need some new work clothes...Yippee.

Successful Marriages III

So, we've covered what a successful marriage should look like (a team,) we've talked about 10 things people do to destroy their marriages. Now I'd like to take that same list and talk about how we can turn the negatives into positives.

10. Invest all your time in activities that take you away from your family.

Solution: Realize that your life is no longer your own. First and foremost, it belongs to God. Second, You got married and had kids, that means sacrifice. Stop acting, thinking, and dreaming like your single. Find things you can do as a family. One day all your kids will be grown and you'll have plenty of time to fish, shop, and get mani-pedi's. Until then whenever you get to do these things it's a treat not a right....It's all about attitude. Your not entitled to anything, and neither am I.

9. Develop a circle of online friends that you keep hidden from your spouse.

Solution: If your spouse doesn't have access to your emails, facebook, or anything else online what are you trying to hide? April can, and usually does read, everything on my facebook or email accounts. I not only allow it, I welcome it. I don't want to hide anything. Your work accounts are different (don't get yourself fired or in legal trouble over this one) as long as you do not use them for personal stuff.

8. Bottle up all your emotions, thoughts, and feelings refusing to share them until the spouse guesses why you are ignoring them.

Solution: Be willing to talk about everything. Sex. Money. Dreams. Fears. Faith. Nothing is off limits. Just talk. Also, understand everyone is different and that's a good thing.

7. Spend time fantasizing about other people. Could be porn on the internet, Facebook, romance novels, etc.

Solution: The grass is the greenest where it's watered (if you live in the country it's the greenest over the septic tank....think about that one.) The other person you're dreaming about isn't better. If you'd put the amount of energy into your marriage as you're putting into the fantasy you'd be much better off.

6. Using rationale in your decisions. For example, He bought a new (whatever) so I am entitled to buy a new (whatever.)

Solution: Stop resorting to playground mentality. Just because someone (your spouse) made a selfish decision doesn't mean you should too. In fact, if you do, in the long run, you're going to be worse off for it. If you're reading this one and thinking about it, I can already tell you your finances are screwed up and you're in debt. If that's the case PLEASE break this rule once and go pick up a copy of Dave Ramseys book THE TOTAL MONEY MAKEOVER and do what it says.

5. Putting your spouse down as a way to make you feel better or look good. Could be in front of them or others. Either way, it's still wrong.

Solution: Vow that you'll never say anything negative about your spouse in front of anyone. If you have a problem with something your spouse is doing why are you not talking to them? Your girlfriend can't help them be a better person and neither can your mother. If you weren't doing something right would you want your business told all over town? Protect the mother or father of your kids reputation and talk to them about it and not everyone else.

4. Lying about places you've been, things you've done, or people you've seen.

Solution: First, tell the truth. Second, stop doing things you'll be ashamed of. Remember you belong to God first. Honor that.

3. Keeping a separate web presence that your spouse isn't allowed to see. Emails, face book, web pages, or whatever.

Solution: See number 9 :) It's also why April and I have a combined facebook page.

2. Expecting your spouse to meet your needs. Any needs.

Solution: Last time I checked the role of God was taken. Your spouse cannot meet your needs. They are a companion and a helper. If you're waiting for your spouse to meet your needs it will never happen.

1. Hiding finances.

Solution: See #6! Seriously, get on a budget. Find one both of you can live with and agree to hold each other accountable. Sit down at least once a week and account for where your money is going. If your not paying attention to your finances your not minding your family's business. On that note, allow each other the freedom to spend a little money on yourselves without guilt. April and I have a budget. We live by it. I also have a set amount of money each pay period that I take out in cash that is my personal spending allowance. I can do with it whatever I want no questions asked. I love it! It has saved us countless arguments. I do not spend more than that amount or I get very stern looks :)

Hope you have gotten something out of these posts.

Successful Marriages Part II

Yesterday, I wrote a post about successful marriages and what they look like. The key to a successful marriage is teamwork. Today, I am going to write the top ten things a person can do to sabotage their marriage by acting selfishly. This is by no means a scientific list, just some reflections of mine. Part III of this blog series will come tomorrow or the next day on the top ten things you can do to strengthen your marriage. I'll share the more healthy solutions to these issues...

Top Ten Things Selfish Things a Person Can Do to Sabotage Their Marriage.

10. Invest all your time in activities that take you away from your family.
9. Develop a circle of online friends that you keep hidden from your spouse.
8. Bottle up all your emotions, thoughts, and feelings refusing to share them until the spouse guesses why you are ignoring them.
7. Spend time fantasizing about other people. Could be porn on the internet, Facebook, romance novels, etc.
6. Using rationale in your decisions. For example, He bought a new (whatever) so I am entitled to buy a new (whatever.)
5. Putting your spouse down as a way to make you feel better or look good. Could be in front of them or others. Either way, it's still wrong.
4. Lying about places you've been, things you've done, or people you've seen.
3. Keeping a separate web presence that your spouse isn't allowed to see. Emails, face book, web pages, or whatever.
2. Expecting your spouse to meet your needs. Any needs.
1. Hiding finances.

These are in no particular order. Just observations. If you have something you'd like to add feel free to comment :)

Successful Marriages

Driving back to our vacation rental after a fun day at a Disney water park I heard Dennis Rainey say something so profound in terms of marriage I thought it needed to be shared and expounded upon here. He said "if you are looking for a single trait that defines what a successful marriage is it's this. It looks like and acts like a team." Successful marriages are defined by whether or not both parties are working as a team. Dang. That is so simple, yet so profound.

So that begs the question: How can marriage be all about being a team? It's simple, yet very difficult. The only way a marriage can become about team is when the two people in the marriage learn to serve each other and make sure their needs are met before worrying about their own needs. Having said that, I understand how difficult that is. Everything in this world says it's all about me. But, the key to a successful marriage is putting the other person first and me second.

You might say, well I would do that, but you just don't understand how selfish my spouse is. All that they care about is them. If I did that I wouldn't have anything for me.....I hear what your saying, but the truth is, I have never seen a relationship where one person is selfish and the other one is selfless. Usually, both are pretty selfish in there own way. You might argue, I'll stop worrying about me, as soon as the other person stops doing "XYZ." I am hear to tell you, if that's what your waiting for it'll never happen.

Your job is to worry about your heart being in the right place, not about the other persons heart....In Matthew 20:28 Jesus said " For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many." If Jesus came here to serve others what makes you think you can make things about you and find happiness in a marriage or anywhere else for that matter?

More on this topic later this week....

Family Time!

Tomorrow morning we leave for Florida. It's our last "family vacation." Chelsea is 19 and Jake will be graduating next year and we've kinda made the decision that next year April and I will go alone and the kids can focus on work and school. It's a little bittersweet to say the least.

Being a divorced and remarried dad, we've always looked forward to our summer vacations because it was extended alone time with the kids. Over the years we've taken them to Montana, Colorado, California, Mexico (on a cruise) and Florida (3 times.) We've loved every minute of it....Sad to say this is the last year.

To all you parents of small kids who are frustrated. Hold on, it only lasts for a season. It just seemed like it was yesterday when my little one's were having an argument about whether airplanes take off (the girl)or blast off (the boy) (long story!) They grow so fast.....

George Carlin vs Jesus

George Carlin was a brilliant comedian. He had great timing, intellect, and whit. He was a comedians comedian....people looked up to him. He once made the joke "Did you ever notice that it's mostly older people reading the Bible? He said, that puzzled me, then one day I realized the old people are going to die soon, they are studying for the final exam!"

While certainly funny, that statement bears no resemblance to the truth. The simple fact its, it really doesn't matter how much of the Bible a person knows. I've read the Bible cover to cover multiple times and there isn't a single reference to gaining a certain amount knowledge as the key to getting into heaven.

Jesus on the other hand says come to me. I'll make your burden lighter. Come to me, I'm all you need.

It's not, has never been, nor ever will be about how much you know. The Bible wasn't given to us to help us increase our knowledge. What matters is the condition of your heart. I'd much rather have that over cramming for an exam.....just sayin'

Sunday Mind Dump

Almost time for vacation. Looking forward to our week in Florida with the kids. We rented a house and are mostly going to unplug and relax, with healthy doses of sun and swimming mixed in there. It's Sunday and that means a Sunday Mind Dump...so let's dump:

• Reminded again this morning that nothing bad comes our way without God's hands in it and an opportunity for our growth. We can either learn from the struggles or not, but they're still coming.
• The band played very well today in light of some really tough tech and sound issues. Those issues are part of what you deal with being a portable church. Glad everyone ignored them and had fun anyway. The flip side, now I have to go back and troubleshoot that soundboard this week!
• Getting ready to read a book I have been wanting to read for some time called "Repenting of Religion." It's all about learning to love and move past judging others. No matter who you are judging others is a problem. Our job as Christians is to love, God judges. Case closed :)
• Great job Scott Brewster. This message series is killer. You've got a lot of people talking....
• Might be bringing an electric guitar out for worship soon. Gonna sit down and work some stuff out this week and see if I like what I hear!
• Thinking a lot about my calling lately. Praying for wisdom about that.
  
• Last week of classes. I am VERY happy about that....VERY happy.

I am outta here....need to spend some time with the wife.

Sunday Mind Dump

This is the Monday afternoon version of the Sunday Mind Dump....so here goes:

• God's really been dealing with me on some things lately. Most of them are personal and need not be mentioned, but know this. It doesn't matter who you are...your journey in growing in God never ends. As soon as you think you have a handle on something, He rocks your world with something new.
• A decent day playing guitar yesterday. My memory has been not the best lately. If this keeps up I think I might get myself a music stand and some charts. I don't like making mistakes like forgetting words I should be singing.
• 242 is making some progress in terms of hammering down it's mission and values. That's a good and much needed thing. Looking forward to continuing working with Scott on building the ministry. Got a few thoughts about things we need to start planning for so we are ready for launching in the spring.
  
• Vacation coming up. It'll be nice to spend a week with the family with no phones or jobs.
  
• Looking forward to Tuesday night. April and I are going up to Detroit to see Hillsong Live. We haven't been to a concert in ages. I love Hillsong's music so this is going to be awesome.
  

I Understand

Many people in the church just can't figure out why the rest of the world doesn't want anything to do with the church. You have to understand, it's not Jesus they dislike, it's most of us. People like Jesus, he modeled love, he modeled compassion. Jesus understood pain in a way we never will. It's not Jesus people don't like. It's you and it's me.

Why don't people like us? Look at your life. How are you living his love? How are you doing meeting people's needs? How are you loving people most of us wouldn't want to go near? My guess is most of us aren't. If you want proof of why people hate the church take the blinders off and try looking at a few of these things for starters:

• What does your facebook page say about you? Are you spewing hate? Are you bad mouthing politicians and people you don't like? Or are you praying for them as the Bible commands.
• Check your wallet. How much of your money is going to help those in need?
• Check your time. How much time are you giving towards helping people?
• Check your friends. When is the last time you had a friend who is hurting over for dinner and conversation with no strings attached?

I could go on. But each of us needs to take a hard look at our lives and ask ourselves if we are living out what we claim we believe. My guess is most of us aren't.

Sunday Mind Dump

• Great day of worship yesterday. The band was tight, the people sang along, God was blessed.
• Looking forward to vacation in a few weeks with the family. I love getting away with the family.
• I am teaching April to play bass. She's doing well!
• Jake is really kicking butt on the drums.
  
• Still praying about what's next for us in ministry terms. I think I have an idea, but usually when I do God rocks my world and something else happens. So we'll see :)
• Loving my new Taylor guitar. Feels great playing it, and it sounds even better!
• We've been broke all summer....That's right, it's college tuition time...Another $8000 bucks sent off to Huntington.
  
• Table for 10 moves to our house this weekend. Looking forward to it.
• Only 3 weeks of summer classes left. I am ready for that to be over with!
  

Summer

This is the first summer in a few years that I have literally had nothing to do (except a couple of classes I am taking!) It's been nice in some ways. I am enjoying the lack of stress and full schedule. It also feels a little weird as I had been so busy for the last few years I just feel like I should be out doing something.

At some point, we'll most likely be back in full-time ministry and my quiet time will be over. Until then we are relaxing and enjoying it. We're enjoying giving back to God through leading worship at 242 Church and we'll see where God leads. April and I have some things to pray about in terms of where God wants us long term. It's been interesting, we've had a few offers to go back to working in ministry over the last few months, some have been tempting but we're just waiting on God.

Sunday Mind Dump

Just thought I'd take a few minutes and dump about a few things:

• Pray for your pastor. Seriously, they need it. I have several guys I have been praying for lately. They have a harder job than you will ever know. The pressures of leading a church can be tremendous.
• April and I have been sick for a few days. Trying to figure out if it's something we ate or just a virus.
• Enjoying my summer down time, although it will get busier as I am starting 2 classes next week.
• Enjoying serving at 242 Church. It's a haul on Sunday mornings but we're enjoying it.
• Enjoying playing music and leading worship again. Didn't know how long we'd be out of it in terms of not leading worship. Thankful for the chance to do it again.
• Working on some ideas about how to truly do blended worship for a pretty conservative community of believers. It's not as easy as one would think, no matter what you do some one isn't going to like it.
• Next week is Jake's first week drumming at the new church. We'll see how that goes. Up till now it's been just an acoustic guitar and a keyboard.
• I am out!
  

Mind Dumps

I know I haven't been as regular with mind dumps as in the past. I'm working on it...so here we go:

• Things are going well at 242 Church. It is a struggle for April and I in terms of style as we are much more aggressive in worship and the people at 242 are a little more traditional. We are trying to approach the ministry with a missionary mindset and bring worship of God to them in a way that works for them, while still stretching them a little every week. So far so good....If they put up chicken wire, that'll be a sign we have pushed to far :)
• Did some remodeling around the house. That was fun! I did better than I would have thought and will eventually do more!
• I am taking 4 classes this summer. That's keeping me busy!
• Loving my new guitar. I really like the Taylor feel and sound. It's killing my fingers getting them back into acoustic guitar shape after not playing for so long.
• Looking forward to a weeks vacation in August. We rented a nice house in Fl with a swimming pool. The 4 of us are going to be relaxing big time.
  
• I think I am going to take a few days next week and just do nothing. I need a few days of quiet time....just listening to God and not speaking much. We all need times of quiet. God speaks with a still small voice. It's hard to hear him over all the noise in our lives.

Sunday Mind Dump

So, I haven't really done the Sunday Mind Dump since we closed Real Life and April and I stopped doing full-time ministry. I thought I would take a few minutes and do a little mind dumping and give those who read this blog a little status update as to what April and I are doing these days.

After we closed RL we just plain took a few months off and relaxed. To be really honest, that church took everything we had and more and we just needed a break. At the start of the new year we started getting ourselves back out there and visiting churches around the area. We hung out with old friends, met some new ones, and just spent some time reflecting. Though our journey we ran across places we "could" attend but no place that felt like home for us.

A month or so ago, we learned that Aprils parents Pastor was resigning his position at their home church and starting a new church in Findlay. We also knew that they would need some help and knowing we had just been down that road we offered to assist them in any way they felt would be helpful. So, after some prayer and speaking with them, we have agreed to help lead worship at 242 Church in Findlay.

Our first morning was this morning and all things considered it went well. Very positive comments from the folks there this morning. It's definitely a different feel than leading worship at RL, not that it's a bad or a good thing. Just different.

On the whole for both of us it feels really great to just be back out there doing what God has gifted us to do. I may get more involved on a pastoral level as we go, and then again, I may not, we'll just see where God leads on that one. For now it's just awesome to stand before God with a guitar and a microphone and worship him. Leading his people is an honor. No matter what style, format, or band. Don't ever forget that. It doesn't matter that it's worship, cleaning up, setting up chairs, teaching kids, or preaching. Serving our God is a form of worshiping him and this morning it felt awesome and humbling that 7 months after closing RL we were allowed to get back at it again.

Readings, God, and His Leading

Over the last few weeks I have been doing some reading on the corporate church. It's clearer than ever to me really, in many ways, how little the church concerns itself with restoration of the broken and hurting. Churches, corporately, tend to care about that which they can measure. That which they can produce and see tangible results. You can't measure restoration of the broken. Yet that's really why we are here isn't it? I mean Jesus came to seek and save that which was lost, and to heal up the broken.

I myself am guilty. It's much easier to build a program that to concern ourselves with restoration of the broken. Not sure, what the answer is to this right now and to be honest if I had a nice 3, 5, 0r, 10 step way to fix it then that would in essence be just creating another program to try and produce the desired results.

I had a conversation with a great friend today that got me thinking along these lines today. It's amazing sometimes how God speaks in one area of your life then confirms that word in another. Not sure where any of this is going....but still glad to know God is speaking to me.

Death, Dying, and Time.

This year it has been ten years since my father passed from this life into eternity. It's never easy to loose someone you care about, its really hard to loose a parent. Every year it has gotten slightly easier to deal with. I just realized after going to Joe's funeral last week that it had been ten years since Dad died. Usually, I would remember the date he passed and I would think about him and get a little nostalgic. This year, I totally missed remembering his date by like three weeks.

Time, couple with a life connected to God makes the loss easier to deal with. For those that have lost someone and are still struggling understand this: There is no magic pill to take away the pain or the loss. If there were we'd all have taken it. Learning to deal with that pain and running to God in the midst of the pain is part of our growth as Christians and as people.

As tough as it is to do I say embrace the pain, turn it all over to the one who really knows and can do something about it. Turn it over to God.

Ten years later, I am thankful to have had my Dad in my life. I realize now, how much I have grown in God since he has left. Not that the two are related, but in many ways they are....

Pain and Suffering

Today I stood at the foot of a bed. In the bed was a man that had suffered more over the last few years than anyone I had ever seen or heard about. I'll spare you the details...It was difficult for me to watch as an outsider, not a member of the family. This morning, he was released from his pain.

There's an old Wayne Watson song called Home Free. One of the lines in that song was: at the ultimate healing we will be home free. I have always loved that song and it's times like this that remind us that heaven is our home.

One thing I can say with certainty is this. God never promised us a life without pain and suffering. He simply promised us he'd be there with us in the midst of it. That doesn't bring much solace for those who grieve. But we all need to remind ourselves from time to time that God watched his own son suffer at the hands of those he was there to save.

My encouragement for each person that reads this blog is this. Take the time and thank God for everything in your life. The good, the bad, and the indifferent. You never know when it will be the last time you are able to do that. If you have issues that are unresolved with a parent, humble yourself and make your peace with them.

None of us is promised another breath.

Forget About God's Will

One of the major theme's of Chan's book Forgotten God is that we should spend less time trying to figure out what God's will is for our lives and spend more time allowing The Holy Spirit to speak to us and lead us.

WOW, how true is that!

If we could learn to get ourselves out of the way and learn to allow God a more prominent place in our lives the simple fact is we wouldn't even have to question what his will for our lives was. Why? Because if we were living lives lead by the spirit he'd lead us to the place where his will lies for us!

How do we get more of the Holy Spirit in our lives? Simple: 1st invite him and spend some quality time communing with him. 2nd, understand he speaks with a still small voice. In order to hear him you'll have to get some of the noise out of your life and get some quiet in your life.

Messed Up

I have been reading Francis Chan's book The Forgotten God. There have been numerous things in that book that have just plain messed me up. Pastor Chan asked the question if you and I are so good and so right how would the kingdom of God improve if everyone (all people in the church) were just like you?

For example:

• Would there be more than enough love for God's people? Would everyone be a better friend?
  
• Would the church thrive or collapse because of your giving? Remember everyone is just like you!
• Would the hurting find love, acceptance, and help? Or would they face a world full of bitterness and fundamentalism?
• Would anyone ever teach a class, hold a Bible study, or a home group? Or would people wander through life alone without the help of a brother or sister?

Now, of course this is not a realistic picture of how God chose to inhabit the earth. It's still a great reminder though that all of us have some growing to do, cause none of us have spiritually made it yet!

Another Great Post By Perry

Another great post by Perry. I cannot tell you the amount of times people would call me asking me these very questions....Well said.

Ten Questions That Unchurched People ARE NOT Asking!
Posted: 31 Mar 2010 04:13 AM PDT
#1 – “What do you do to disciple people?” (This question is usually asked by people who want to ‘microwave” spiritually, not understand that they themselves actually became mature in the “crock pot.”)
#2 – “Who is speaking this weekend?” (They usually don’t care about the WHO…it’s the WHAT that matters to them.)
#3 – “Are you reformed in your theology?” (Most of them have no idea what in the heck this means!)
#4 – “Is your church spirit filled?”
#5 – “What version of the Bible do you use?” (Many unchurched people don’t even really know there are different versions!)
#6 – “What denomination are you affiliated with?”
#7 – “How many different activities can I sign my family up for in order to add to the insane schedule that we already have?”
#8 – “Does your pastor teach exegetically through the Scriptures?”
#9 – “Are there lots of crosses and pictures of Jesus in your church?”
#10 – “Are you guys pre trib, mid trib, post trib or partial trib?”

Napster Playlist

Been listening to a ton of new music over the last few months. Here's the top 5 CD's on the Renner playlist

1. Robbie Seay Band-Miracle....Awesome worship CD. Very well written and thought provoking as Robbie usually is with his writing.
2. Daniel Doss Band-Love the song Great God.
3. Kari Jobe-Love the song You are For Me. So simple, so worshipful, and so darn good.
4. Danny Gokey-Yes, he was on American Idol. What can I say, the boy can flat out sing. Besides, my cousin is his keyboard player....
5. Alison Krauss-Just love that voice and the new grass sound.

I know it's an eclectic collection but hey, I can listen to what I like right?

Hurting, Forgiveness, Love, and Trust

Like most people, I have experienced my share of pain, hurt, and disappointment. I've felt let down by pastors, friends, and often those closest to me. I've often heard it said "why is it that those closest to me are the ones that hurt me the most?"

There is a simple, yet quite profound answer to that question. The simple answer is that people that aren't closest to us don't have the kind of access into our lives that is capable of causing serious pain to us. It's a tough world and sometimes people outside of our lives will say cruel things to us but we can usually just blow that off right? But I am talking about the daggers that come from those we love and care about. How do we handle that? That's a little harder to do now isn't it?

When trying to answer and deal with this question it's important to understand one principle. Hurting people do hurtful things. I have never, ever met a really well adjusted person with no axe to grind, that would live to say and do hurtful things. Never once. If someone is hurting you they are more than likely hurting themselves and displacing their unhealed hurts onto you and most likely others.

When that happens you have a choice. You can hold it in and start the process of allowing the cancer of hurt to take root in you, or you can offer forgiveness. Most likely forgiveness is the last thing you'll feel like offering but it's critical for your health. Don't hang on to other folks pain. Now that doesn't mean you have to allow them to continue to hurt you. It simply means don't hold it against them. It's for your good not theirs!

Here is a principle I have been wrestling with lately: Forgiveness is immediate and permanent. Trust is earned and re-earned over time. That means that those who have hurt you can regain your trust but it takes time.

I've got some hurts just like you. I can't and won't allow those hurts to define me, control me, or set the agenda for my life. I have to allow God to be on the throne of my life. He says forgiveness isn't optional.

Politics and the Church

Anyone that knows me knows I play around on Facebook daily. It's a cool place to keep up with friends both new and old. It's also a fun place to play games like scrabble and just plain have a laugh. One of the things that have really grated on me lately is when Christians that I know spend countless hours wrapped up in posting really hateful political statements (especially in light of the current health care debates) on social networking sites. Here are just a few of my personal thoughts and reflections:

• Why do so many of you condemn people that you disagree with politically? I have seen post after post with comments like "I hope they burn in hell for this." Where is the love of Christ anywhere in that statement?
• God isn't a conservative or a liberal. He's God. He loves and died for us all. Everything on this earth will pass away.
  
• Wondering if some of us in the church are placing our faith, even if it's just a little bit, in our country and in our politicians? Our hope has to be found in Jesus and not what any one political party can do for us or the country.
• Does posting hateful comments strengthen or weaken your witness to those you should be reaching. Studies show people know and like Jesus, he was a man of peace. What they don't like are Christians. By your words and actions are you glorifying him? Or your political agenda? By your words are you the picture of the stereotype of the angry Christian?
• I certainly have my feelings about the issues, and for the record, I am against the current health care proposal, but my hope is not found in the president, any political party, or even the USA. My hope rests squarely on the cross of Christ. I care, I vote, but I don't want to speak hate about people.
  

Church Visits

We really enjoyed yesterday visit to Ten Mile Vineyard. I have been personally enamoured with the Vineyard movements DNA for some time and hadn't really had a chance to hang out and observe it in action. Some of the things I personally enjoy are that they (Vineyard) tend to focus on many of the things that drew me to starting RL. As a movement they focus on worship, teaching, and relatioships.

Here are some of my observations from yesterday:

• Worship was a big part of the experience. They started with 5 songs. A few fast songs and a few slow songs with weekly communion built into the actual worship service itself. I actually enjoyed that aspect as a way of personal time with God in the midst of a crowd of people.
• Teaching was expository. Although I generally teach topically there were quite a bit of references back to the personal needs we all have as humans.
• Relationships seem to be built into the DNA of the local church as there is an emphesis on getting involved and building relationships.
• There was a very casual feel and most people were dressed in jeans and tee shirts. That's a big plus for me :)

We're going to go back in two weeks.

Sunday Thoughts

• This morning we are headed out to check out a church I have been curious about for quite some time. I actually had coffee with the pastor of the church a few years ago and he seemed like a good guy and I really liked their story and mission so this morning we are going to pay them a visit!
• Spent a little time praying for many churches and their pastors this morning. Praying they bring it and God manifests himself in their churches this morning.
• God's been working on my heart about forgiving some people this week. One thing God has been revealing to me is that forgiveness is instant and permanent. The trust that they have violated requires rebuilding on their part but that has nothing to do with the forgiveness part.
• We think we might have found a new van. Stay tuned the answer will come Monday if the price is right.
• Really enjoying playing music again.
• Been great for the last 5 months not being tied down on Sunday mornings. I have actually thought about doing some church reviews on a separate blog for people that are actively seeking a new church. Anyway, just kicking that idea around right now.
• Nice being able to catch up with old RL friends over the last few weeks. Good meals and good conversation.....nice!
• Looks like it's time to head out to check out that church. God bless!!
  

Rules!

Read this blog post by Steven Furtick and thought it was dead on.....enjoy!

Make the rules

Posted: 09 Mar 2010 01:00 AM PST

I read a post by Seth Godin in 2005 about how smart companies make new rules. It was all about redefining markets and challenging the status quo.
I never forgot it.

It got me thinking about different approaches to the Christian life:
you can either keep the rules, break the rules, or make the rules.

Most people associate Christianity with keeping the rules. Don’t murder or commit adultery; do serve & give to the poor…etc.
Of course, God’s laws are perfect, and His principles should be honored.
But Christianity is so much more than a set of rules to keep.
Jesus perfectly fulfilled the Law. We live by grace, through faith.
When you try to be a rule keeping kind of Christian, you always come up short, and will probably eventually burn out. You’ll also miss the essence of the Gospel.

Some people opt to reject God’s Word altogether and break the rules.
We’ve all seen people who profess to be Christians drift off into rebellious, sinful, destructive behavior. Sometimes they even justify their loose living by claiming that they’re expressing their freedom in Christ. Of course, this is nonsense. How can we who died to sin live in it any longer? Carnality is the worst form of bondage-and the furthest thing from freedom.

I believe Jesus came to make the rules. New rules. To upgrade our paradigms and renovate our hearts in His image. Jesus redefined religion. And those who follow Him should be a part of creating and exemplifying this new standard to the world.

Some people keep the rules.
Others end up breaking themselves against the rules.
True followers of Jesus make the rules…set the standard, and change the world.

Infidelity

Heard one of the best messages on marital infidelity ever yesterday. As I was listening/watching the message by Craig Groeshel (Lifechurch.tv) I couldn't help but see images of friends and family members that have suffered through the pain of an unfaithful spouse. Here are some of the high points of the message taken from the Biblical account of Gomer's unfaithfulness to Hosea:

• No spouse will ever meet 100% of a persons needs. But let's say that the faithful spouse meets 80% of the unfaithful spouses needs. What is essentially happening is that unfaithful spouse is ignoring the 80% of his or her needs that are being met and cheating for the 20% that aren't. Doesn't seem like that good of a deal does it? An 80 for 20 exchange?
  
• Much like the unfaithful spouse we have been unfaithful to God. When we are looking for a model as to how we should respond to infidelity we should look at how God responds to our infidelity. Righteous anger, followed by unending and crazy love.
• We see a beautiful picture of this principle being played out in the life of Hosea who went and purchased his wife back from her pimp and loved her. Just like in spite of our unfaithfulness God purchased us back. Great picture. Great picture of God's love for us.

Here's the link. Anyone who has experienced unfaithfulness in a relationship or is feeling like they might stray needs to take a few minutes and allow God to speak to you: http://www.lifechurch.tv/message-archive/watch/once-upon-a-marriage/4

Have you ever noticed?

Have you ever noticed how still your home is when you get up a few hours before everyone else? Sometimes I think I'd like to be able to sleep more on the weekends but I really do enjoy the quiet and the time of reflection each and every Saturday. Just me and God alone.

Some of the things I have been reflecting on this morning:

• How blessed I really am. We are all in good health. We have steady jobs and a roof over our head. That's more than 90% of the people on the planet can say.
• I am thankful that despite my shortcomings God still loves me and sees fit to work through me in whatever way he chooses.
• I've been thinking the last few days about how much I really enjoy worshipping God through music. I am not quite ready to go back to being a part of a worship band yet but I am thankful that when God opens that door I'll have a passion for it again.
• I am thankful for the gift of God's son. His sacrifice was more than enough to cover up all my wrongs.
  

Why I dislike religion....

I really have a hard time being a religious person. In fact, I really don't care for religion at all. I have said many times before most of the time I really don't even like being called a "Christian" because in our world there are just so many negatives attached to that label. I really prefer just being a follower of Jesus. Where he goes I will go, where he leads I will follow, what he did I will do.

Why is religion a bad thing?

• Religion gives us a checklist of thing we must do in order to be saved. Jesus on the other hand says pick up your cross and follow me.
  
• Religion says to place our allegiance in a program, building, or activity. Jesus says we are to trust in him.
• Religion cares more for the institution than the individual. Jesus says "Whatever we do for the least of these we do to him."
• Religion tears people down, causes wars, and pits people against each other. Jesus calls us to love God, then love our neighbor as ourselves.

Not sure where all this came from tonight. But I am feeling rather feisty!

Long Way To Go

Over the last few months we've been to a number of different churches. It really is a little surreal going to a church and not having anything to do. I often find myself judging the church and thinking about things I would be doing differently were I on staff at said church. Which proves one thing to me. I am still detoxing from Real Life. I have to get to the point where I am not looking at church through the lens of church leadership and administration.

A couple of things:
First: God places a call on a persons life for ministry. I'll never get away from that. I know what my calling is and someday, in God's time, I'll be back to working and walking in that calling.
Second: That said, at this point in my life I need to get to the place where I am just in church to recieve from Him, give back to Him and serve Him wherever he leads.

It's a tough thing to do. That's why April and I have pretty much decided that we are going to start regularly attending a larger church in the area. It's not a place I could see myself in ministry. It's easy to get lost there. We are going to get involved in a small group and spend the next couple of years just being Jeff and April.

It's going to be tough but we feel it's something we need to do right now.

Random Tuesday Stuff

• It's a snowday today and April has been home sick for two days. It's painful enough to watch her being sick, but then I now have to wonder is my time coming to get this thing. I am sure hoping and praying no!!
• The new band is coming along. My idea to take an 80's new wave song and rock it out went really well. Won't share the song title yet, you'll have to come hang with us when we start playing live.
• Too much snow. need to fire up the snow blower and take a layer off.
• I have never had less to do. There have been moments over the last few weeks that I have felt like "I need to get back to ministry." Those moments have been quickly coming and going. I think I'll be ready to step into something when I become consumed with it again and not just bored.
  
• There are a few books I am going to pick up. One is Killing Cockroaches by Tony Morgan. I know I spent way to much energy on doing just that. If you wonder what that means you'll have to pick up the book and read it for yourself!
• Changed my diet up a little bit as I was struggling with hunger on the other one. I feel great and have lost 4 more pounds since that change. Very excited about that!
  

UP

Ok, I know it's a kids movie but the movie UP has one of the best morals and storylines I have seen in a movie in quite some time. I really enjoyed it.

Props to Pixar on this one!!

Still Going Strong

We are still going strong on the eating right loosing weight plan. I have been loosing 1-2 pounds per week. I am still just trying to take things slow and make better choices with what I put into my mouth. Avoiding fried foods and trying to keep the portion size reasonable. I have been watching my calorie intake as well. Just trying to keep tabs on things so I am not eating more than I should be without realizing it. I have been trying to eat around 300 calories for breakfast, 500 calories for lunch and 700 calories for dinner. Then I can have some fruit or string cheese in between meals and I am good for the day. You'd be surprised how much food that actually is when you cut out fried and processed foods!

I also bought a treadmill (which I have to put together today) so I can start getting my ticker in shape. Plus that will help burn through some calories. I am on my way to my target weight. It's probably going to take a year to get there this way, but I'd rather take my time and do this right than do it quick only to gain it all back after the diet is done.

Why Am I So Drawn To A Crash?

Like most people I enjoy a good story. Lately though, it seems I am more and more drawn to things that I really should pay no attention to. Kinda like when your driving down the freeway only to find yourself stuck in a mile long traffic jam when the accident in question was on the other side of the road. The only real reason for the traffic back up is people taking their eyes off what they should be looking at (the road ahead) and looking at what they shouldn't be looking at (the accident.)

This morning I was playing around on a social networking site and saw a post by my wife's niece that said a promenant Christian (remaining nameless to stop eveyone else from gawking) was now a practicing scientologist. This peeked my interest and I immediately stopped what I was doing and took 20 minutes to look for proof of the transgression (which I found none.) I thought nothing of it this morning and then on my way to work the question hit me: How much time do we spend chasing after watching someone else crash and burn? How much time do we spend looking with a smirk on our faces while others lives are falling apart?

The gossip magazines are chock full of stories about this garbage and they must be doing alright because I have never heard of one going out of business for lack of sales. Evey in a bad economy like this one where traditional print media is on the brink of bankruptcy it seems the gossip magazines are doing well. What does that say about us as a people.

Proverbs 17:4 Wrongdoers eagerly listen to gossip; liars pay close attention to slander. (NLT)

Dang, that hurts.

Good Morning

This is pretty much a rest and recuperation type year for April and I. In many ways ministry has taken a toll on us mentally, spiritually, and physically. So, we are trying to take some time (as I have previously blogged about) to kinda bring those things back to center in our lives. I wanted to talk a little about some things God has been dealing with me on.

First, I realize that I have put on a tremendous amount of weight since starting in ministry. I have gained 40 lbs. Now, that didn't happen over night. It happened slowly by not being careful, always being on the run, and never wanting to walk away from a tasty treat. For this year, I have set a goal of losing 70 lbs and getting myself back to what I think is a healthy weight for me. Since I started I have lost a total of 10 lbs and am feeling pretty good about things.

For me, I really wanted to focus more on a creating a healthier lifestyle that just getting on a diet to loose weight. So here is what I am doing. Cutting fried foods out of my life, avoiding things that have been overly processed, and eating more fruits and veggies. I am also trying to work on eating every couple of hours to avoid being famished at meals. So I am snacking on fruits, cheese, and yogurt in between meals and then eating smaller "meals." It seems to be doing the trick so far.

I have also ordered a treadmill so I can work on getting my cardio in. I want to start working on getting in better shape and having more endurance. Also, the running will help my tennis game for this summer!

That's it, nothing profound just trying to make slightly better food choices and getting a little time in on the treadmill a few days a week.

Random Thoughts

Been doing a lot of soul searching and thinking over the last few months and some things have really come full cricle and others are still their floating around in my heart and head. I am starting to get some clarity on some things. So here are some radom thoughts I have had:

• Over the last few months I have had people and pastors ask me if I would ever plant a church again. As of right now the answer is no, and yes. I can't see myself doing another plant that rises from nothing without the support of a mother church. It's simply too hard to have enough support and workers to be viable. I would consider planting again if the situation were correct and we had proper support from a mother church.
• That said, it would be a long time before I was ready to do it again, and even if I were I am not sure I would take on a lead pastor role. I am better suited to be an executive pastor that serves as a church planter then allows someone else to take on the work once it is established.
• I see, at least right now, my next vocational ministry being more along the role of an executive/teaching pastor.
• When you're in ministry you face a lot of criticism. Everyone has a better idea than you do about how you should be doing things. A few things I have learned about criticisms:
• First, unless a person is willing to step up and take a share of owning the problem and the solution, their criticisms are hallow and stink of personal preference and possibly an agenda.
• Second, and this I think rings true whether you're in ministry or not. Never trust a person who isn't willing to sit down man to man or woman to woman and discuss their issues with you. If they are willing to tell their problems to other but not you watch your back.
• Since we closed Real Life I have had 3 offers to come help out other ministries. I am flattered and humbled for that. But really, I just don't feel released in my spirit to do anything right now. At some point I hope and pray God puts that passion and his anointing back on my life but I just don't feel it's their right now. Until that happens April and I are content to sit and wait on God.
• We have however begun the process of trying to find a new church home. We are taking our time and looking for the right place for us.

Quiet Time

Over the last year or so I have had very, very little quiet time. I talked a good game about it but I just didn't find much time for it. God has been really hitting me over the head with how much of a junkie I am. Internet, TV, books, music, and a host of other things take up my time and I couldn't seem to find quiet in my life.

Last night I finally broke out of that mold. After April went to bed I just turned it all off, and sat in a room alone with God. I told myself I wanted five good minutes with God. I was amazed at how hard it was to get five good minutes. My mind kept racing, thoughts kept pouring in, it was hard. I am not going to lie, it took almost a half an hour to get five good minutes. Every time I'd get myself out of the way something else would pop into my mind, or a thought would race.

Those five minutes, were awesome. Felt God speaking to me for the first time in a long time.

Random Life Updates

As part of my vision 2010 post I talked about some things I am working on changing in my life. I thought I would update some of those things periodically.

• April and I decided to leave HallowVox. It's a great band and ministry but in the end it was us costing more time, money, and resources than we wanted to contribute.
• My musical vision is that I want to use whatever musical ability I have to reach people here in Toledo. So, I have started working on some other musical projects that will be focused here in Toledo rather than regionally.
• I started my new eating plan last week and I am doing OK with it. So far I am down 7lbs and feeling pretty good.
• We are still seeking God about the next church of ministry he'd have us attend/serve in. Don't really feel like we are released to go and do much yet. One of these days....
• Still doing a lot of reading and waiting :)

Vision 2010

Ok, so I know it's usually a church that has a vision statement or has a vision message about where they are going in the upcoming year. So, I thought why shouldn't I have a vision blog about where I see God taking me and what I think God is working on in me?

So here goes:

I am going to spend 2010 getting healthier, stronger, and better connected to those I am called to reach.

Getting healthier:

• (Physically)I have put on 50 lbs over the last 7-8 years. Not healthy, not good, and seriously causing some health probelems. That weight has got to come off period. I started eating better last week and can already feel the results. I want to drop about 70 total lbs.
• (Spiritually) I have been running on empty for too long. I am not even thinking about any type of vocational ministry. I want to take as much time as I feel like God needs me to take to recharge my spiritual batteries.
• (Emotionally) I have been hurt by some people I cared deeply for and I am working on processing that
• (Relationally) I am putting some things in place in my life that will help me reconnect with people I feel like God is calling me to reach. It means some reprioritizing of my time, talents, and efforts. It means saying goodbye to some things and hello to others.

I have really enjoyed the last two months. My calander has been clearer than ever, I have had more time to spend with my family, and am starting to make some sense of some things that have puzzled me for a while.

Life is good. God is good.

We're Back

April and I are back from our winter get away. We had a fun time in the Caribbean sun and are now ready to get back to work.

On a personal note, God showed me some pretty tough things in terms of area's that I really need to grow in. It's encouraging that we are always a work in progress with God and that none of us are perfected yet.